Dear Doctor,

Dear Doctor,

I understand that you have worked hard to learn and know everything required to become a doctor.  You may also have years of experience to support what you know.  I respect all the effort and time you have put into this.


I don’t know you.

Trust takes time to build and requires you to take time to explain yourself, what you want to do and most importantly, WHY you want to do it.  I don’t like having to go to the internet in hopes of finding accurate information.  Though, you often leave me with no other recourse than this because you don’t explain.

Just because you think you know what is going on is not enough reason in and of itself for me to pump my body full of drugs or take invasive tests.  Particularly since I am not like everyone else you have seen and you often miss or forget things like my severe food allergies and how that affects these drugs and whether or not I can take them.  I know that this may be driven by the sheer number of patients you see in a day, but you chose this and I expect more.

I don’t know you AND YOU DON’T KNOW ME – only my symptoms.

I am so much more than that which I am struggling with right now.  Please don’t distance yourself so much that you don’t see ME, not the version of me that is in your head but ME the person sitting in front of you.

Understand that for me you are part of the problem I am having with my health.  I don’t mean to associate you with my illness, but I hate my illness, and you unfortunately are a part of that.  While I may come to terms with my illness, how I feel about you is entirely dependent on whether or not you respect me enough to give me all the information and not hold back.  This is a moment where you are playing God as you decide what I need to know.

Every time you hold back I can sense it and it damages trust – or if there is no trust yet, makes it near impossible to get there.

I want to be well.  I need you to help me make that possible, but if you truly want to help me I need you to be more than the sum of your medical knowledge.


~Your patient


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